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Are You Dating an Army Soldier or a Fake?

If you don’t want to read the rest of this article, there is one surefire way to know if your soldier is fake:

If a soldier you’re “dating” online asks you for money for ANY reason, it’s a scam. Period. End of story. [Click to tweet this]

And as my husband says….If you have to ask, it’s a scam.


UPDATE: Two women were prosecuted for receiving over one million dollars from 374 people in these scams! Story here.

Since starting the website in 2004, I have received many emails from people who believe they are dating a soldier when, in most cases, they actually are not. Nine times out of ten, they “met” their soldier on a social networking site, such as Facebook, or an online dating site. And he is the one who just happened to find her while he was looking around and decided she’s going to be his future wife. What he really means is she’s going to be his next victim.


Stories That Are Lies

He’s in Special Operations

1. He is in a special operations unit and therefore cannot share any information with you. It’s true that special ops guys can’t discuss their job but that also means they don’t tell random strangers they’re in special ops. My husband was special ops. When we would go out with a bunch of guys from his unit and people would ask what they did, they simply replied they were in the Army. Special ops guys don’t brag about it. They’re known as “quiet professionals” for a reason.

He’s Been Denied Leave

2. He has been deployed for two years, has been denied leave time and will not be coming home any time soon therefore you won’t be able to meet. If there were soldiers being denied leave after being overseas for years at a time, it would be ALL over the news. It’s a lie.

He’s on a Top Secret Mission

3. He is on a top secret mission in a country other than Iraq or Afghanistan (or even in Iraq or Afghanistan – it’s all lies). Now, we certainly do have troops in other countries. However, they don’t talk about it and they certainly don’t tell you they are on a “top secret mission”. Also, any special operations soldier worth his beret will not reveal his location to someone he doesn’t know (or even someone he does!).

He Needs Permission from Someone in His Unit

4. He says he is not allowed to talk about what he does, however, he has cleared it with his CO that he can tell you enough to make you believe he is who he says. This is followed by outrageous lies. If he truly is not allowed to share any details about his job, his CO doesn’t even allow him to talk about it with family, much less someone he met on the internet. Sometimes with this tactic, they will ask you to email/send mail to the CO to ask for permission. Then the supposed CO sends back a letter asking for money to connect a phone line or some other complete lie.

Everyone Around Him is Dead

5. He says one of the following….his parents died, his wife died in his arms, his wife was killed in a car accident along with all of his children, his children are orphaned and living in some remote location, or he was orphaned……all LIES. My favorite is when they combine all these things. Really? I know some very unlucky people but this is just over the top. And I mean if this was for real and that kind of luck follows him, why do you want to be with him?

He Has No Mailing Address

6. He says he doesn’t have a mailing address because either he is in a classified unit or his position changes so often. Even in special operations, he’ll have an APO address. And this is not a post office box and it’s not in Nigeria!! It also has nothing to do with a Western Union office. And you don’t have to send it through a relative because he can’t give out his address.

He Needs Money for Leave

7. He says he needs you to pay for his R&R leave because the Army doesn’t pay for it. This is absolutely false! A real soldier will not request money to travel home as he doesn’t need it! The Army pays for all travel to and from a war zone. This includes emergency travel like the death of a loved one. It’s not like you just book your own flight home from Afghanistan on Delta.

He Needs You to Request His Leave

8. He says he can come home but you have to request his leave through an email address. If all an Army spouse had to do was email her soldier’s commander to get him home from deployment, don’t you think ALL Army spouses would be doing this? There would be no one deployed. The Army does not allow leave requests from Army family members. In fact, even in the case of the death of an immediate family member, the information has to be verified by the American Red Cross before the soldier’s command is contacted for possible leave by officials at the Red Cross – they don’t just take your word for it.

He Needs You to Pay for a Phone Line

9. He wants you to pay for a phone line, cell phone or calling card so you can talk to each other. Real soldiers can call home for FREE. My husband deployed multiple times and we never paid for a single phone call. If he asks for this, he’s a scam artist. Not to mention, soldiers are making enough to buy a phone card if they really had to.

He’s About to Retire

10. He’s about to retire and then he can marry you and live happily ever after. This usually also includes stories about being a higher ranking officer. Typical story and it’s all lies. Real officers have even LESS time to be online talking to strangers over the internet.

His Child Needs XYZ

11. He has a child that is dying or needs surgery (or some other medical emergency) and he needs the money to pay for it. All military dependents are covered by Tricare, which for the most part is amazing insurance. I had a c-section and was in the hospital in a private room for three days. Know how much I paid? $12. Real soldiers aren’t paying out of pocket for their kid’s medical care.

He’s a General

12. And he’s only 28! Wow, talk about a quick advancement! LOL A General will have well over 20 years of service and less than 1% of officers will make it to the rank of General. On top of that, Generals make a minimum of $12,000 per month in JUST base pay. So why exactly would he need money from you?

His Pay is Deposited in the U.S. and He Has No Access

13. Seriously? First, the Army is providing the essentials while you’re deployed so there’s not a need for a lot of money overseas. Second, you can have access to your money, so this is yet another lie. There are ATMs on any main post and the PX accepts debit and credit cards. If he says he’s somewhere that there isn’t an ATM or another way to get money, there is also nothing for him to spend money on. So why does he need it?

He’s On a Peacekeeping Mission in {insert name of country}

14. Last time I checked we aren’t on a lot of peacekeeping missions in Nigeria and Syria. And if we were, a real soldier wouldn’t tell you that.

Verify The Truth

So how can you find out if he’s telling the truth?

The absolute best way to verify is with #2 – ask him to email you from his AKO address.

  1. Ask for his mailing address overseas. If he can’t provide one, he is lying. There is nothing secretive about an APO address. And an APO address will not be a post office box. It’s also not at a Western Union office!
  2. Ask him to give you his AKO email address rather than his yahoo, hotmail, etc. This will be his firstname.lastname@us.army.mil. All soldiers have an AKO account. There is NO reason why he can’t provide it – regardless of what unit he is assigned to, what his mission may be, who he’s working for, etc. And the AKO account is free so him saying his credit card hasn’t been processed or his account is locked because he didn’t pay is also a lie. If he refuses to provide this, he’s fake.

I originally had other questions you could ask regarding his training, etc, but I’m removing those because many people believed whatever ridiculous information he came up with when they asked.

But you say he’s sent you pictures or a copy of his ID?

Many have been provided pictures, copies of military identification cards, even videos. First, pictures can be grabbed from anywhere on the internet – there’s no guarantee you’re talking to that person. They may very well be using the picture of a real soldier but that doesn’t mean you’re talking to him. Some of these scumbags are using the pictures of soldiers who were killed in action to run their scams. It’s sick.

Someone told me once they were dating a General and she even had pictures. I told her to send them to me. Guess who the pictures were of? David Petraeus!

Some use totally fake pictures in uniforms that are all messed up – I’ve seen Army uniforms with Air Force tapes and Navy insignia – no joke.

I’ve seen very badly doctored military ID cards where it’s obvious he’s typed over information on the card. What’s funny is he’ll type over the only legitimate information on the card and replace it with something that makes no sense. Such as rank of SPC and pay grade of MAJ.

The pictures they use many times on military IDs are so fake and it’s so obvious. Real military ID pictures basically look like a mugshot – solid background with him in uniform and basically only showing his face (maybe the very top of his shoulders). Someone sent me one the other day that not only looked nothing like a military ID (more like a business card for a recruiter), it had a picture of a soldier who was obviously at a military ball or some other formal event as he had a bow tie with his dress uniform. That is NOT an ID picture.

Or maybe he’s added you on Facebook and even changed his relationship status to you

The Army posted this example on their Facebook page:


So exactly which one are you dating? Oh and by the way, I’ve never seen a soldier unless it was on an official page (such as the base commander’s page) that uses his rank in his name.

Soldiers Don’t Have Time For This

99.9% of military guys overseas don’t have the time available to them to email, chat and Skype for hours at a time or even every day online. They are too busy doing their JOB. And most have no interest in “dating” someone online while they’re deployed. Continuing to talk to their loved one that they knew before deployment? Absolutely! Time to peruse dating sites and chat for hours? Absolutely not.

But he said he loves you and wants to marry you….even though you “met” last week

I’m assuming if you’re falling for this, you’ve never been in a military town. Go downtown in a military town to a club one night and let me know how many single soldiers are there looking for the love of their life….not exactly what their goal is. And when you’re thousands of miles away from each other, he doesn’t have the opportunity to sleep with you. So the point would be???

Many of these stories contain comments about him saying he loves you within a few days/weeks of starting to talk or he wants to marry you as soon as he returns. Let’s get this straight – you haven’t met and certainly haven’t had the opportunity to have any kind of physical relationship, yet he wants to marry you? Does this sound feasible to you? If you’re even hesitating on the answer, I’ll help you. It’s not. They’re lying so they can get in your wallet. And they’re doing this to many others at the same time they’re doing it to you. It’s just who is going to open up access to their bank account first.

But you asked him if he was a scammer and he said no!

Come on, think about this! Why would he admit it to you? Or even better, he told you he is in fact a scammer but he REALLY loves you…..as long as you keep sending him money.

He hasn’t asked for money yet though

Don’t worry, he will. If any of the above signs sound familiar, it’s only a matter of time. He may get pretty far into his story before he asks. He may wait until his plane is suppose to leave and you’re meeting him in less than 24 hours. Then all of the sudden disaster strikes and he needs three grand to be able to come home. LIES!

Even though he’s doing these things, you still think he’s the real deal

I hate to be harsh but if any of the above sounds familiar, it’s a SCAM. Don’t sit there and think you’re the exception. You’re not the lucky one who’s encountered these signs but somehow your guy is the real deal. He’s FAKE. He doesn’t love you. He doesn’t want to marry you. And sooner or later, he’s going to ask for money.

I get emails and messages (or comments) from people who tell me the story and ask me if he’s fake. I answer yes, it’s a scam. And what do they do? Keep asking me more questions – but he does this or he said this or he sent me these pictures. Guess what? The answer is still the same. It’s a scam. Go back and read the first line in bold at the top of this article. I don’t care if he asks you to mail him a penny – a real soldier will NOT ask you for money. A real soldier makes more overseas than he does when he’s home!!

The Scam Checklist

So let me sum this up:

  • If he’s asking for money for a phone line, it’s a scam.
  • If he’s asking for money for travel home, it’s a scam.
  • If he needs you to help him move money from one location to another, it’s a scam.
  • If he asks for your bank account information, it’s a scam.
  • If he wants you to wire money for ANY reason via Western Union (or similar service), it’s a scam.
  • If he asks you to email his command so he can come home, it’s a scam.
  • If he tells you to open a bank account or credit card for him, it’s a scam (and this one could get you into legal trouble!)

PLEASE quit sending these people money! If you’re just itching to give away your money, send it to me! haha After all, I’ve spent more hours than I can count updating this article with the latest techniques and answering questions here and elsewhere.

Finally, if you don’t believe me, please read this article from the Army – Soldier Scams

About the author: Stacey is an Army wife of a soldier who joined in 2003. He has since been medically retired but she continues to provide information to Army wives and families to make their adjustment to the Army lifestyle easier. Connect with Stacey: Facebook Twitter Pinterest

{ 1140 comments… add one }

  • karen colenbaugh June 19, 2014, 2:13 pm

    i have been emailing a captain in the army stationed in kabul afganistan we talked for 2 weeks wanted me to b by his side forever wanted me to take care of his daughter and i fell for it until he asked me for 4000.00 then i blew it. his name is philip joe missangale he said if i didnt get him home he would kill himself its to bad these people are trying to get money that way

  • Maribel June 19, 2014, 5:07 pm

    I meet 2 sergeant: Jeff David Perkins he said to me that he is in Kabul his e-mail is jeffperkins20@yahoo.com and Cherish Morgan he said to me that he is in Syria his e-mail is kenbranch16@yahoo.com; so I ask them for them to send an email from them AKO email account, and both said that they don´t have cos, bla bla bla.
    Well thanks for all the information that all of you post here, cos I used to confirm that they are scammers.
    PD: I meet them on miumeet.
    On miumeet and on moonit, there are a lot scammers. I reported 10. So ladys be carefull.

  • lola June 20, 2014, 4:10 am

    I have met a soilder on a dating websites by the name of jordan Richardson he is based in nigeria on seceret missions since January for the first few months it was find then he told me is did have 3 months free Internet so I will nee to pay which I did send it £50 second time is to talk on the radio phone cost me £106 then the third time he said he ask is boss about a mobile phone which I send another £50 then he said he borrow £20 more from one of the Nigerian soilder and I am to send it back I ask about his salary he said it is paid into his account in the state he is from dallas texas is parent died in a accident with his sister and he grew up with is grandparents and his mum Italian and dad American he also stated he love me he only talk to me like for an hour on line at nights and he normally said he is going out to work sometimes he is out all night he normally complaints of been weak and tired he also stated about his job in nigeria is about the terrorist attacks most of what he said sound real from the job prospects but the money put a doubt in my head even though I send it but I will not send any more he is not well complaints of headache constantly he said he goes to the doctor and it is £50 for his medical treatment I told him I don’t have it he start crying on the phone anyway also he asked me to write to his commander for leave request which I did first I emailed the commander and ask if jordan is real and if he is real he said captian jordan Richardson is a member of the US army Airforce was based in Afghanistan and is now on a seceret suvailance in nigeria he vagly say he don’t know if is leaving before time which would be in November he would have to pay so I said to him if it is going to cost money he will have to stay there until November but I fall in love with this man who I don’t know his pictures are all over my Facebook I told people is a friend and I am just messing about I have been single for 9 years never talk to anyone and if he is a scam I small done with men I also copy and paste the scam site about nigeria soilder scam and he was mad at me saying he can’t believe I don’t trust him please help me here you got to find out about him as I am madly in love with him he also talk about getting married not a lot he send me photos I send him also I am a registered nurse is email address is rbilly269@yahoo.com and is commander email address is genjose.dunford@usa name joseph dunford I Google him and his name is real jordan Richardson also at first email was Jordanrichardson@yahoo.c but not in used if I try to use it email not send I also end up talking to a lady on line and she told me he is not who he said he is so I ask him he stated that woman search for him and every one he try to tslk to she tell them bad things about him he also said she was asking him fir h’s bank details in America so they could go into business he told me he earn good money he don’t need mines but is because he is in Nigeria and the economy is so poor so different from Afghanistan so much more to say yours truly lola don’t want my correct name on here

    • Stacey Abler June 20, 2014, 10:02 am

      This is a scam. Soldiers continue to be paid when they are overseas and they have access to their money. There is NO reason for a soldier to be asking you for money. And there’s no such thing as requesting his leave from his commander. There’s also no such thing as the “Air Force Army”. Cut off communication and stop sending him money. He is not in love with you – he is using you for money. And he’s doing it to multiple other women at the same time.

  • Amy June 20, 2014, 9:57 pm

    I know I am in the midst of being scammed! I refuse to send this guy any money. I have read several sites about these military scams but I have a new one for you, out of all the sites no one has had the situation That this guy has put me in. First he started out as “General Raymond Chandler” now he is “Sergeant major Raymond F. Chandler”. He has not asked for me to help with his leave, his family is alive, but he’s on a” peace keeping mission” in Syria. He has tried to tell me that “he’s on contract with United Nations and NATO”. I might not Have much knowledge about military but I’m smart enough to know that that’s nothing but a bunch of bull! yes; of course he “cannot reach his money” because he’s on the war front and that’s the way the United Nations keep soldiers from just taking off, Right! And of course “he can’t call me or video chat” with me. anyways this new scam is that NATO and the United Nations has seen and been watching Our conversations and they questioned him for hours, so he told them that “we were married” that way we could continue to speak with one another. But since he said that they want a copy of our marriage certificate. he has to show them proof of our marriage or we can’t talk until his contract is up in 6 years. At first he had a few weeks to come up with it and as of today he’s down to three days and he has to present the certificate to them. So he has contacted a barrister which just happens to be from “Ghana” and I was to call this barrister and he would help us get a copy of our marriage certificate. So I played along so that I could report the new scam. I must say that this has only been going on for the past week. so though he has not asked me directly for money I get an email from This barrister and I’m supposed to fill out the form and send it along with $859 and We will have our marriage certificate and he will be home to me and three days time. Please pass this new one out it is so ridiculous.
    Thank your husband for being a true soldier and serving our country!

    • Maria June 29, 2014, 5:01 pm

      Hey Amy

      I looked up your post quite interesting i am very surprise by this ridiculous tactics
      i’m current dating a soldier Gen. James from Syria please could you forward me all the
      emails from the scammer and his lawyer so i will read and get prepared when my so called gen James will come up with his cos i’m doubting him here my email mariah.luci@yahoo.com thank you
      come up with his

  • kelly June 22, 2014, 12:22 pm

    Just wanted to put out there that someone is impersonating.. kim cameron king. All this discusses me ! How does one let the t reall kim cameron king know. I have very personal pictures. It’s not right

    • tanya July 19, 2014, 12:21 pm

      I have picture of a Ron Arnold I would also like to know how do we let the real person know what is being done

  • monica June 23, 2014, 4:10 am

    I meet a soldier name mark kelly… he ask me if I can send him a money because he cannot access his account in the country where he was now… his now in tunisia for a mission. He said also the reason why he cannot access his money is because there is no bank of america on tunisia.. I want to ask if its true that the us marines cannot access there own account? Or if the soldier have there own money even if they are in mission?
    Thank you

    • Jon July 1, 2014, 3:21 pm


      Soldiers that are deployed the front lines are given everything they need to live by whomever thier branch of service. If they are not thier chain-of-command try to get these things (like batteries, soap, or toothpaste). There is usually no where for them to spend thier money and if there is they usually a bank card or there is a way for the soldier to access thier money. I was on the Asadabad border and i didn’t need anythign all year while deployed. I made all orders from Amazon and eventually it showd up in my mail.

      SFC in the Army

      • monica July 10, 2014, 10:09 pm

        Thank you sir. Jon for answering my question. I was really confused about this soldier because he really want me to send money to him so he can go home because he said he dont have money to buy the ticket. I even ask for his AKO but he said he doesn’t have.

  • Carin June 24, 2014, 2:09 pm

    I live in Sweden and are also talking to a US army sargeant by the name Derick Marty… The thing is that I know hes not for real… but I play stupid and tries to get as much info as I can… And I know this why??? Because I asked him what time it was and he replied 5.08 AM and if it were true it would be 7.30PM since Afghanistan is 2.5 hour before Sweden in time… after 15 minutes I asked him again what time it was, claiming the net was messed up and our conversation got lost and then he replied that the time was 7.08AM… Time must be speeding in Afghanistan if 15 minutes here in Sweden means 2 hours down there… He has called me on Yahoo messenger but can’t take a picture with the webcam or do a webcam call because its not allowed right now due to the terrorist threat… He says terrorist uses women to chat with soldiers on daitingsites and askes to webcam with them to get indide the base… Yeah right… He hasn’t asked me for any money at all… yet. ..

    But the thing I wonder is… how do they get all tje pictures?? I mean its also private pictures of the person and just the thought of them using deceased soldiers pictures makes my stomach turn… I would really like the real “Derick Marty” know hes Photos are being used to potentially scam women…

    So it can be as easy to check what time it is girls ;)

    • Jackie July 14, 2014, 5:00 pm

      Yeah I believe you are right I think I may be talking to the same Derick Marty as you have been. Is his E-Mail address sgt.derickmarty@yahoo.com??

    • jackie July 16, 2014, 6:09 pm

      yes this guy is fake i had him checked out with our military here in canada and they say there is no sgt derick marty in the army..dont believe anything he tells you cause he just moves from one to another once he knows ur catching on

  • sharon June 24, 2014, 8:52 pm

    Well, so glad I found this site.. thank you! He’s a fake..met a soldier on OkCupid.. 1SG Michael O’Ferrell..
    Deployed in Iraq..after only 2 days of texting.. a few text..and 2 letters from him ..he wants me to get him a 200 pack phone cards..
    He tells me he loves me .. excuse me!!

  • Rose June 25, 2014, 12:22 am

    I was also recently scammed. His name is kelvin Jones. Stationed in kabul Afghanistan army e6. An officer his wife died 5 yrs ago his son in boarding school.

  • carolinne June 25, 2014, 12:35 am

    I too am confused, I was approached by a man on Meetme.com claimed to be an American Army Soldier by the name of Sgt. Victor Ellis, 13 years service with a 4 yr old daughter which he has over seas in Nigeria with him. After about a week of talking on line he asked for a dew BUCKS, only $100.00 ,I questioned him on few things & HE IMMEDIATLEY Gave me his MOS E 29-electrical. Told me he does not live on base that he and his daughter live in an apartment, he gets a BHA but was tight on money.Then asked for $50.00. Said I cant. I then proceeded to ask about his pay and he told me it gets put to his account, that he does get an allowence but ran short this month.After asking why not open an account there being he was there for 7 months now, with now return date to stateside. Said he did not want to open another account cause he has 1 in the states under wells fargo in california, & with all the things going on in Nigeria didnt want to open 1 up there. says hes been over there for 7 months now ??? He has sent me pictures of himself,& 1 with a buddy and i asked him where taken he says Nigeria.Says his Dad passed away when he was 6 yrs old, his Mother died 8 yrs ago, no brothers or sisters. That his daughters mother who he wanted to marry up and left him with the baby to raise. Beautiful girl named Donna, If he is on the up and up shame on me!!!! but if not then i made a mistake,He has my cell phone # but only texts it. He just gave me and International # but I dont have that type of calling out to there on my cell phone plan. I have tried to find info out on him but not much luck anywhere, we are facebook friends, and talk . If someone can help me in finding out if Sgt.Victor Ellis is real I would apprecipiate it, my email is ocalayankee@aol.com. if you need further information on this Army Soldier, Thank- You very much. Carolinne

    • Jon NA July 1, 2014, 3:27 pm

      If he is short on cash he can get a advance in pay. He gets bah pay and bas for housing and food for his family. Not sure what his bills look like, but if I had a daughter in Nigeria I would have plenty of money left over becuase as a single parent what else are you doing with all your money. There is a pay scale online for all ranks and time in service. Go type in thier rank with a little help from google you can probaly find out how much he gets in BAH.

  • Laura June 25, 2014, 7:26 am

    Hi my mother in law met a man saying he’s a doctoer working in Syria in the eu and he has a year contract but they won’t let him break is contract till he pays 15 grand throw a email address we all tried to tell her it’s a scam but she believes his lies I don’t no what we can do

    • Jon NA July 1, 2014, 3:31 pm

      Tell you Mom that as Doctor serving in Syria he made a commitment. There is a payscale on line for the military. Show her how much he makes a year and then let her know he could pay that on his own in just a few months base don his rank. If he made that commitment he should honor it. Especially if he is a soldier! For example, I am required to go whereever the Army sends me and I’ll never fight it, i go where the Army tells me to go.

  • tammy June 26, 2014, 11:40 pm

    Stay away from raymond chandler soppose to be in the army. he tried to scam for 1000.00.

  • Joanne June 27, 2014, 7:34 pm

    I’m met a soldier on DateHookup and says he’s in Afghanistan and has to wait to get paid to call me , then later in the conversation he asked for money to call , and I said I don’t have any money and he said no I don’t want you to send any money I will call when I get paid and I asked him when does he get paid and he says when he gets home which will be before the end of the year . There were some other red flag issues and I basically deleted his profil. I wanna know whos picture he’s using how can I find out who the picture is?

    • Stacey Abler June 28, 2014, 8:15 am

      You can try to do a reverse image search on Google – I’ve had some luck doing it that way. You can also google the name he gave you. Many times they don’t change their name from one scam to the next.

      • Char June 29, 2014, 1:15 am

        Does Google work better than Bing when searching names ?
        Also want to thank you for this site I have read a lot of good information here. I have been chatting with a so called General. Some time back he said he was in the UK (London) and now he is some where else, cant remember off hand. But any way I have called him on a few lies. And there is no way in this world that I am sending any money. Today was we kind a went to video chat. I asked him to move his hand I wanted to make sure it was live. Then it sopped. He says : (i have to close it for security reasons…. you have to understand my position here…… it has been traced by the EE department here…. ) I said…. it looked like a still picture. If he had mad a movement. I could have said yeah he’s real… But there was no movement. Still have my red flags going up…. What do you think.
        Char M.

  • elizabeth June 27, 2014, 10:49 pm

    hi! i met a soldier from christian dating for free. i want to make sure that i am not being scammed so a friend of mine sent me this website. i asked him for his ako email address and we shall see if he is scam. he has not asked me for money but has said that he has a ts2 phone that wont charge. that is why i have been doing research on this soldier to make sure i am not being scammed. i hate that there are people who ruin online dating for others. i am not stupid and will not let myself fall for a schmuck. thank you so much for this helpful info.

    • Stacey Abler June 28, 2014, 8:12 am

      You’re welcome! Remember if they ask for money, it’s a scam!

      • Fi July 15, 2014, 7:31 am

        Hey Stacey, thank you for all the help. Question how does reverse image search work? What am I looking for?

        • Stacey Abler July 19, 2014, 8:50 am

          When you do the reverse image search, it will show you where else that picture is on the internet. In most cases, you can find the actual owner of the pictures. In some cases, you’ll find out how many times it’s been used to scam others.

  • Lynn in Atlanta, GA June 27, 2014, 10:55 pm

    I loved your article. It was straight to the point so people can get the message. In fact, it even had me chuckling at times. I wish I had read this before I met this guy on Match.com who claimed to be in the army in Afghanistan. Your article shares alot of information that I did not know about. No one in my family was ever in the military so I am clueless when it comes to that. He claimed his name was Cpt. Karl Hounslow and used the email address karl.ox@aol.com. He explained to me his parents had died as well as his son’s mother who is 5-years-old and is living back in the states with a nanny. He is getting ready to retire after 24 years in the military and will be coming home soon. We began chatting on June 12 and on June 25 he asked me to send him money for items he badly needed. Of course I questioned why the army just couldn’t give him these things or why he didn’t have his own money and he said the army had frozen all his accounts so he had no access to any funds. So, I need to contact the army and inquire about the process for sending the funds. The reply is below.

    Hi Again Lynn M. Kovalchik,

    The Closest CO to him is in India, you are going to send to the CCO Via Western Union money Transfer, and once the funds is Sent you will need to provide us the following details

    The Name of His closest CO is:Peter Green (Will be used as the receiver’s Name for the transfer)

    And Address : 83 Ring Road,Bangalore,MH,India

    Send the funds to the name and address above and give us the above listed information afterwards, then the funds will be use to purchase the items you sent earlier and delivered to AFG340956SD at earliest possible time.
    The Calculated Amount for the Items as provided from Business unit is $1020.
    If you need to send the Pictures and Cards, you will need to wait till we get his addres which can come later after the Care package is delivered to him.

    Well, needless to say I didn’t send him any money and when I realized it was a scam I ceased all communication with him and starting doing my homework which led me to here. I plan to tell my story on as many websites as possible so that others could learn from it. I, fortunately, didn’t end up getting duped but there are many other women out there who are not so lucky.

    • Stacey Abler June 28, 2014, 8:12 am

      Thank you so much for sharing and I’m glad you realized it was a scam!

      • MAG July 3, 2014, 6:41 pm

        thank you….and God Bless You….you saved me! God is good!!! I just had a bad gut feeling and my gut was right!!!! Thank you for posting this!!!

  • michelle kiuchi June 28, 2014, 2:07 am

    Hi! I just want to know how can i make sure if the person im chatting w/ is really exist in tripoli libya. His name is sgt victor james adams, his email, sgtadams222@gmail.com Hes coming out of the camp for retirement this 30th of june,2 more days w/ other 41 members. He said theyre not receiving yet the papers to sign up before the flight so he and those others who will fly w/ him here to japan ,accdg. to what theyve heard fr their colleagues in nigeria ,have decided to wrote a letter to the captain in nigeria about getting an air ticket as another option for the paper .they thought that the delay maybe the war crisis in many parts of the world.he also said that he is not allowed to keep money inside the camp and that his salary goes directly to his home country in uk. Pls give me some info and advice about this coz im confused w/ other military things too. Thank you so much for your kind cooperation. Im eagerly wait for your response

    • Jon NA July 1, 2014, 3:39 pm


      If the soldier is American, there is a process when they begin speration called ACAP. this process helps you translate your military career to something more marketetable in the world. I don’t know how the British Army works, but I would say something similiar. Usually there is a command structure were they are and find it hard to belive they had to write a CPT in Nigiria if they are in Libiya. I say SCAM, give no money.

  • Mel June 28, 2014, 6:38 pm

    A “soldier” by the name of Brad Chris Favela contacted me through Facebook. I had a feeling he wasn’t for real. No one tells you they love you and want to marry you in a few days of chatting with you. It’s so very sad :( he started to ask me for 700 dollars to pay his “boss” so we can talk on phone. Yeah right!!! I might be nice enough to chat with him but not dumb enough to send him money! What a scam!! He sent me pics of supposedly himself and his parents. What a waste I would have loved to really been chatting with a REAL SOLDIER :) so sad!!!!! And disappointed :(

    • Karen July 12, 2014, 2:23 am

      Yes, I met one called Joey Gough and the first red flag was how “committed” he was to me from the first minute! However in my case he spoke extremely poor English… I knew something was amiss, and within 2 days of talking to him he asked me for an Iphone so we could talk… I was like – Hell no. LOL..
      I have reported him to IC3 but I doubt they have much to go on.
      I hate that there are so many of these awful people. I too would love to have talked to a real soldier, I have so much respect and admiration for them!
      Best of luck!

  • jam June 29, 2014, 4:01 am

    Hi, i meet this man in OKC and he said he is in the military. He’s name he said is Sgt. Kenneth Grocke. He said he is based in Arizona. I’ve been talking to him for almost 2mos now and never asks for money. However, i have doubts of him. I asked for his phone number but he said he doesn’t have one. He has no smart phone. So we only chat in yahoo messenger and skype sometimes..but never had a video chat ever bexause he said it is not allowed since he is in the intillegence base and most everything is blocked and being supervised. He doesn’t share enough information bexause of his line of job. But i will do what you suggested. I will ask for his APO address and AKO account. He said he will visit me but still working on his leave. He said he will send me documents that I need to bring to the embassy requesting for.his leave. I have no idea if its true. Please advice. Thank you.

  • Nils-Erik Grönvall June 29, 2014, 5:36 am

    Thanks for a very good artical and very much information. I’m a guy that get contacted by a Sgt. Joanna Brautigam and she claims to have seen me on facebook. Perhaps she has, I don’t know but thanks to your easy read artical it was easy for me to make her the right questions. She’s a scammer! I found at another website that all correspondence will go trough a @mil e-mail adress. I’m getting an .mil@usa.com adress…. So it’s not only women that get scammed by so called us army soldiers. Best regards Nils-Erik Sweden

  • lulu July 3, 2014, 10:50 pm

    Found one fake sergent in spanish dating page , he sent me photos of orphants children 3-5 years old . Thanks yo for your advice I was near to be scammed. Really thanks you.

  • gloria July 5, 2014, 6:16 pm

    Hi I meet a guy name Maxwell hopper his email is maxwellhoppar yhahoo.com. meet him on a dating site . He is in army deployed in mitilary in afganstain and want to come home want me to send for his leave of adsence. But do not know if he is real say he has to pay his troops he is from my hone town. He’s last name is McDonald he say he is a sargent in military. He want me to send him a care package his phone say usmobile which says r with a circle is that real. Us army mobile with a circle need to know . As soon as possible can ant in help me. He does have a gmail message. Maxwellhoppar gmail.com . Been talking to him for three months. He did has if I had a credit card he said he will send me money and I send it back to pay his roots but I did not believed him pls he’ll if he is a scammers . He say he will be home in sept. But need NY help

  • yvonne scott July 6, 2014, 9:30 pm

    i have met two men claiming to be american soldiers one is over in nigeria helping looking for the 200 missing girls, he asked me to send him money for a cell phone and money for food, his name is mark oliveros, then there is a soldier in kabul afgh he wanted me to send him money so he could go on a vacation leave to come home to marry me. his name is richard morgan. i went to speak with two live soldiers and he comfirmed what i already read online about scams. so if you come up with either one of these men they are scams. right now a soldier named Ben Rodrifuez on facebook is requesting me to open an account so he can have money wired to an account. but on yahoo messenger his name comes up as lammerts philip watch out for him as well.

    • Roseanna Murphy July 14, 2014, 6:13 am

      MY daughter few years back set me up account on site called myyear book. which is now called meet me. i always played the games and chat with few of my friends that moved away. well about a month and a half going on two months now i get a messenger from 1 guy named ANDY JACKSON and his yahoo mess. name is talk2jack1970@yahoo.com and telling me he loved me and to email commander so see if he can come home on leave but i have to pay for his replacement, well i told him i’m not stupid i dont have to pay for replacement that he and his commander are fake and i dont have money. he got pissed off and told me that he was going to be transfered to Africa from Afghanistan , on that falling Monday, so that falling Monday came he sent message saying he didnt have to go than that night he told me he was in Africa well i always ask what time it is there and i go to site and check time he is always right but i told him i’m not some stupid bi… that he can get over on he was really mad then and called me a couple of names. he swears his wife died like 2 years ago of breastcancer sent me pictures of his little girl and him to. i told him pictures looked fake he quiet sending me messages finally. there is another guy says his name is Davis_Bolias223@yahoo.com he trying to tell me his wife and parents died in car crash like 3 years ago and his daughter is in Texas at bording school and he wants to marry me bal bal and he his he doesnt play head games he asked me to email his commander for leave then he send one back with fake leave form and he is telling me that the other guy lied to me that they dont have to pay to take leave then commander email said i had to pay for replacement and he would be home within 3 days. i told him now you guys say i have to pay for replacement. i told him whats wrong with this picture. and funny thing about it andys thing said he was from here in ct he lives in Texas to and Andy says he lives in Dallas and other guy says hes from Houstan Texas. davis said he a captin. sorry about mouth i told them both i am not some old lady that was not born yesterday and dont have a di.. on my forehead. Davis keeps asking for pass word to my email i need to trust him bal abl bal. these two are scam arties i bet working side by side

  • Angel July 7, 2014, 3:53 pm


    Hi. I met someone on Facebook last July 2013 and his name was Peter Williams from Nashville,Tennessee.According to him,he’s in the Army for almost 9 years now. I searched him on Google hoping to find any Scam information that is related to him but I couldn’t find any. We’ve been chatting from July-Dec on Skype and he’s the only one who can see because according to him, Cams are prohibited in Afghanistan. He never ask money from me and I learn to love him because of the way he threats me.That’s why I was really convinced that he’s real.Last October 2013, he was deployed in Syria. We still continue on chatting even though he’s already in Syria.But starting Jan-March, I didn’t hear any words from him. He’s always Offline. Just then a friend of mine gave me an idea to try on using Google image search. When I dragged his photos, I was able to find out that those photos belonged to a Navy Seal named Darrik Benson who was killed in Afghanistan in 2011. My heart was really broken because I gave him all my trust. I sent him a message and gave him the chance to explain everything in Yahoomail as well as in Skype. Then he went Online for a few days but he didn’t give me any explanation. Now I blocked him in Skype. His email add is williamspeter2013@yahoo.com and his Skype ID is Pwilliamsamerica.

    • Angel July 9, 2014, 1:40 pm

      @Stacey: is it possible that he’s not a scammer because he never ask money from me during our 5 months of chatting?

      • Stacey Abler July 10, 2014, 8:32 pm

        If he was using the pictures of a KIA servicemember, he’s almost positively a scammer. And even if by some bizarre twist he’s not, why would you want to have a relationship with someone who would use the picture of someone who was killed in service to our country?

  • lynn cross July 9, 2014, 4:02 am

    hi ive recently started chatting on yahoo messenger to a guy whos based in afghanistan camp eggers .he asked me if id send first 250usd declined then now hes asking for another 500usd so that he can get the ts2 up and running ive asked him questions and now waiting for his replies .his name is jones william brian says hes a bomb disposal soldier if thats right thanx for your help i know he could be a scammer hes actually give me the name of the lady whos acting as his agent love to hear if other ladies have chatted also with this guy

  • colleen July 9, 2014, 4:13 pm

    is there any way of finding out about if somebody really is over there in kabul afghanistan thanks email me

  • susan July 11, 2014, 9:37 am

    I also met a guy on Date hook up.. he said he is in afaganastan. I have pictures his jacket say Davenport. His email is jeffdavenport83@yahoo. .. we were talking for a few weeks and he sent me a video of a large amount if cash and gold bars there was even uncut bills … that is what alerted me to something not right … he wanted me to accept the package and pay the currier. And of course I didnt… we all need to be aware of these people. ..

  • mari July 11, 2014, 12:41 pm

    I have a question dose the military in Kabul Afghanistan has a carrier of name allies Barton delivery service.

  • Karen Bormann July 11, 2014, 3:46 pm

    I met a guy by the name Joey Gough, who said he was on a “peace keeping mission” in Kaful, Liberty Camp. He met me one day and remove his Match.com profile the next day, said he wanted to focus on me…
    Two days after we met said his birthday was 7/20 and for his birthday “he asked me for an I-phone so he could talk to me” Naturally I said – Uh no.

    He also said he would be “retiring in October of this year” and was ready to come and relocate for me…

    His English was really broken.. There was definitely a communication gap… He claimed to be originally from Poland, but joined the army at 20 and is now retiring, at 49, as a Sargent Captain… I KNEW there was something odd about this guy, but you know, if you never met or talked with anyone in the military you just don’t know and you hate to think the worst..

    This article helped put certainty to my doubts – Luckily all I shared were a couple head shot pictures which were on my Match profile and didn’t share anything of relevance with him.

    I think I am done with dating sites! yikes!

  • lupe simpson July 13, 2014, 9:08 am

    I have been talking though text since December 16, 2013 his name is Sgt. Davis Rutherford military police in afganastan
    I just want to know if he’s real

  • Mo July 16, 2014, 10:07 am

    Thanks for this article, Im from a country were army does not exist but for sure fary tales neighter . So on Badoo this “charming” guy who’s ID is Worthy and name Bradley Miller started writing me an too soon talking about love and such, yesterday he made me go to a site that was supposed to be he’s banking account and made see how much money he had. Following to that he stated telling that was to be our money and that he wanted to meet me so bad b that he needed me to write hes general to fill a form and pay a fee that was refoundable. That was when the bells started to ring and common seance appear again, so I started looking for military scam blogs and pages and asked him to chat on Skype he say it was against the rules, then asked him for a mailing address to send him stuff and guess what !!!! he was not able because they are unreachable and last but not least I asked him for his AKO address and guess what again that was classified and that was when he snapped and started telling what a bitch i was not believing him and how he wanted me to stop writing him. So anyway the scary part is how many of this scamers are, how sad they use soldiers pictures, please be careful I’ve learn the lesson and i m grateful for learning the truth before something happend…… If any Bradley miller from NY (brad.miller-0@hotmail.com) write to you just erase him he is a lie.

  • Cleides July 16, 2014, 10:44 pm

    I’d like to know if Sergeant John Adams is in kabul Afeghanistan?

    • Stacey Abler July 19, 2014, 8:48 am

      That name is so common, it would be impossible to tell. If he’s asking you for money, he most certainly is not.

  • bheng July 18, 2014, 2:03 am

    hi, i meet scammer on top face.. they are a lot of scammers, i get there ip number. i trace them from ghana, africa. they are so wise and sweet thoughts girls easy to fall in love, but we need more wiser than them.. here’s the …IP Address:
    IP Blacklist Check: Not Blacklisted
    IP Lookup Location For IP Address:
    Continent: Africa (AF)
    Country: Ghana (GH)
    Capital: Accra
    State: Greater Accra
    City Location: Accra
    ISP: Zain Communications Ltd
    Organization: zain-as
    I hope you can help us to know this people and go to jail!! thanks GOD bless us all!

  • karen July 18, 2014, 8:58 am

    will a doctor there have a AKO?

    • Stacey Abler July 19, 2014, 8:44 am

      It doesn’t matter what his job is in the military, he will still have an AKO.

  • Nikki July 19, 2014, 12:11 am

    thank you you save me, there is alot of those on tagged and now skype casue i am having those ever time i signed in my skype and yes i hace changed it where is a very hard name to find, i well put what i had a man i know he was lieing cause this man was not tv live. [01/07/2014 09:21:15 PM] Nikki Philpott: but i am getting cam in morning hun
    [01/07/2014 09:21:38 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: okay my dear
    [01/07/2014 09:21:40 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: i understand okay
    [01/07/2014 09:23:47 PM] Nikki Philpott: dont worry 2morrow we can go on cam hun
    [01/07/2014 09:24:32 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: okay
    [01/07/2014 09:44:48 PM] Nikki Philpott: send some pic of you hun
    [02:22:14 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: hello dear
    [02:34:24 PM] Nikki Philpott: hello hun
    [02:35:28 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: how are you my beloved wife
    [02:36:01 PM] Nikki Philpott: when did we get married hun?
    [02:37:08 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: soon honey
    [02:37:19 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: we will get married and be together okay my dear
    [02:37:55 PM] Nikki Philpott: ok hun,
    [02:39:24 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: i want you to know that you are always in my heart and i love you so much okay
    [02:40:23 PM] Nikki Philpott: pls let work on love cause you cant love some one you never meet hun
    [02:40:33 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: i know
    [02:41:52 PM] Nikki Philpott: i want to marry to my best friend and my soul mate
    [02:44:25 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: ok
    [02:45:25 PM] Nikki Philpott: have time you been married?
    [02:47:05 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: i dont understand your question
    [02:47:32 PM] Nikki Philpott: have may time you been married?
    [02:47:58 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: i have been married
    [02:48:10 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: but i losy my wife 2 years ago in cancer
    [02:49:12 PM] Nikki Philpott: yes i know but some people have one or 4 wifes. do you have any sisters?
    [02:50:37 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: no
    [02:51:02 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: i am my parent only child and i lost my wife 2 years ago
    [02:53:22 PM] Nikki Philpott: yes i know that hun, its just like i would like to know more about you
    [02:54:13 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: okay honey
    [02:54:26 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: as much as we have time together we will know each other okay honey
    [02:59:06 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: honey
    [02:59:08 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: are you there?
    [03:03:13 PM] Nikki Philpott: ok but if any one ask me about my futur husband what do i tell them
    [03:04:55 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: tell them soon you people will meet okay
    [03:05:35 PM] Nikki Philpott: ok hun
    [03:05:39 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: and be together and make happy family together okay
    [03:06:36 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: honey i want you to always be there for me okay honey and love me the way i love you okay my beloved wife and we will make happy family together okay honey
    [03:06:38 PM] Nikki Philpott: ok hun where we going to live and if you leave the army how we going to support your son hun
    [03:07:01 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: honey
    [03:07:05 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: i am rich already ok
    [03:07:12 PM] Nikki Philpott: ok hun
    [03:07:37 PM] Nikki Philpott: i dont care of money cause i am rich too hun
    [03:08:36 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: okay honey i know
    [03:08:50 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: you are asking me question and i am trying to give you reply okay honey
    [03:09:07 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: once my contract is over in 2 months time i will come to meet you in UK
    [03:09:31 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: and be with you there forever so that we can be together and make happy family together okay honey
    [03:10:05 PM] Nikki Philpott: i like to know you
    [03:11:10 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: okay honey
    [03:11:25 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: soon in 2 months once my contract is over i will cme to meet you in uk
    [03:11:48 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: i want to be with you, love you, marry you and spend the rest of my life happily with you together okay honey
    [03:11:51 PM] Nikki Philpott: do you have any dates hun?
    [03:12:57 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: no i am not into any relationship i am only with you okay hon
    [03:13:35 PM] Nikki Philpott: ok i know. do you talk to uk army over thing hun
    [03:14:11 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: not now
    [03:14:18 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: that i am in iraq
    [03:14:43 PM | Edited 03:14:44 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: i use to communicate with army in uk but right now i am in iraq in peace keeping mission to save life
    [03:14:47 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: ok
    [03:15:50 PM] Nikki Philpott: when do you leave syria? hun
    [03:16:43 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: i am in iraq now this morning
    [03:17:05 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: i went to syria to the army refugee camp to see the situation of things there okay
    [03:17:16 PM] Nikki Philpott: ok hun
    [03:17:35 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: what are you doing?
    [03:22:48 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: okay honey
    [03:23:00 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: I want the kind of relationship that could leads to marriage.
    [03:23:34 PM] Gen Mark Welsh: There are 12 months a year…30 days a month…7 days a week…24 hours a day…60 minutes an hour…but only one like you in a lifetime. i (heart) u
    [03:26:40 PM] Nikki Philpott: ok cant wait hun, i started to luv you

  • alison July 29, 2014, 5:23 pm

    i’v been taking to a soldier for quite a while now just normal chat,he said that he has put in a request for leave so that he can come home and meet me and that he will find out soon but says he will get leave as he is in kabul can he get leave from there?,everything is ok but then he said that he lost his phone whilst on patrol and would i send him some money so he can buy another one over there can he do that?i haven’t sent any money.
    please is he fake or real his name is stephentaylor298@yahoo.com

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