Benefits for Being Married to a Soldier

by Stacey · 7 comments

in Newly Married to the Army

My boyfriend and I have been dating a little over a year. He just finished AIT and is now stationed at Ft. Sill Oklahoma for the next 10 months, until he gets deployed to Kuwait. I’m only 17 and he’s 19. Next year I plan on going to a private college here in my hometown in Texas. We were planning on getting married after he gets home from his deployment but we recently started talking about possibly getting married before he leaves, after I turn 18.

We’re wondering about financial benefits for me while he’s gone since I’ll be living on my own while going to college. He says the army would pay me $850 every month to pay for an apartment. Is this true? Also, where would I find out about army scholarships for college? Basically, I’m wondering if it would be better to marry him after he gets home or before he leaves. Please give me some info to help make the decision easier! Thank you!

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If you are married, you will get a housing allowance while he is deployed that is based on his rank and the zip code of his permanent duty station. That may or may not cover your living expenses while you are in college.

There are some education grant option such as through MyCAA – https://www.militaryonesource.com/MOS/FindInformation/Category/MilitarySpouseCareerAdvancementAccounts.aspx. There are also several scholarships specifically for military spouses. You could check with the education office on post to find out more about those possibilities.

I would like to offer one piece of advice though outside of the actual benefits. The first year of marriage can be difficult with all of the adjustments that come along with it. Adding a deployment to that will only make it harder. If it were me, I would wait until after the deployment is over so you can really spend time together in that first year of marriage.

Good luck with your decision!

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{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }

Madison January 21, 2012 at 12:05 am

Hey there again, Stacey!
So my guy just got his orders after graduating AIT and luckily enough he’s being stationed only two hours away from his home. As wonderful as it is, he has a great chance of being deployed in March depending on which unit he may be stationed in.. and many of those units are being deployed. We’re trying to decide whether or not we should get married- because it wouldn’t be that big of a change compared to what we’re used to. We’ve been together 5 years and lived 400 miles apart, seeing each other seldomly as it is. Basic and AIT was a breeze for us since we were us to not seeing each other often. I just don’t think him leaving on deployment would be as difficult. I know a lot of people are recommended to wait until after deployment to see if their relationship can last the hardship.. but our relationship is strong and healthy as it is.

And if we do get married it will be in the next two weeks when he gets settled in on-base. Any advice?
What about housing and moving me there with him and the process?
Thank you again,
Madison

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Cindy February 6, 2012 at 8:07 pm

Hi Stacey, I would like to clear a few things up for you since I was a soldier and was married when I went in. The money for housing also known as BAH will be based upon the soldier’s location and is part of their checks (its split between the checks on 1st and the 15th) so there is no way that the Army would be paying it directly to you. BAH will only be given to the soldier if they have dependents (spouse/children) inrolled into DEERS. As for the Army paying for school they do have the MGI Bill but in order for a dependent to use it (yes a soldier can transfer it up to 15 years after ETSing) the soldier first must complete their contract and reenlist before the transfer. Last I would suggest waiting till after the deployment to get married since its a great way to test the love for one another. I heard too many fellow soldiers cheat while on deployment (all ranks and genders have done it) and I also heard of spouses cheating while the soldier is on deployment. If you wait and still want to get married thats great and congrats but please remember that there will be many temptaions on both your side and his.

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Mandy March 1, 2012 at 1:30 pm

Hi, My boyfriend is about to leave in 5months for training and we are not married, but I am concerned that if he is deployed or in the Army we wont be able to get married ever….Is this true?

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Cassandra October 27, 2012 at 11:16 pm

im getting married next month to my solider an he already got his first post while at ait and can he has his contract after we get maried so i can go to post with him?

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karyn March 8, 2013 at 1:16 pm

I have a question…my husband and I were married during his leave between basic and ait…he just graduated ait and has yet to receive any benifits for me he said his serg keeps telling him she is going to take him to get me enrolled in deers etc and do the paperwork but never does….I don’t even have my military id yet..no bha nothing, its been 10weeks and this is creating a financial strain on our family. Hes only an E2 and we have a child..He will be here with me for two weeks so I was hoping we could get it straightned out then but he has to pay for his plane ticket to here and to his next duty station before he leaves it’s to the point now where if he does that were not going to be able to pay our rent. Any guidance would be greatly appericated

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cerria brown March 12, 2013 at 9:00 pm

My question is im24 years of age I have a 9 year old and a new. Born. My boyfriend is joining the army soon in and we been together for 3years…and I was told I will not live on the army base because were not married but in that case I don’t what to do?? Also I don’t why he pick a time to join the army we just had a new born baby…how can I handle this situation??

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Stacey March 27, 2013 at 4:05 pm

You won’t be able to live on post unless you are married. You can live off post with him without being married assuming he can get permission from his command to live off post.

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