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The All New Married to the Army

Since starting Married to the Army in 2004, I think I’ve been through five site redesigns. FIVE! The first three of those had all hand-coded pages and I thought I was going to lose my mind. Now that I’m using WordPress, changing the design isn’t near as difficult.

No worries though – it is far from done! There is much more to come and MANY new articles headed your way. How exciting is that?!

I am SUPER excited to have Andrea, a National Guard wife, writing for me as well too. This will help to round out the site. I hope to add more writers in the future. So keep checking back with us and be sure to join us on Facebook where we have a pretty active community.

And of course, let me know what you think about the new design!

About the author: Stacey is an Army wife of a soldier who joined in 2003. He has since been medically retired but she continues to provide information to Army wives and families to make their adjustment to the Army lifestyle easier. Connect with Stacey: Facebook Twitter Pinterest

{ 19 comments… add one }
  • Ian Ibbetson October 26, 2011, 5:50 pm

    Great layout, not sure about the red background though, it takes your focus away from all the fantastic info that is in the middle column. Maybe go with something that is a little less, mmmmm, red?
    sorry, just being honest!

    • Stacey October 26, 2011, 6:40 pm

      I agree – changed it. 🙂 What do you think?

  • Ian Ibbetson October 26, 2011, 6:42 pm

    Much better!! Nice job!

  • Jennifer November 9, 2011, 3:02 pm

    After reading this I have a question. I dont know if you can help me but I have been dating a miliary man for a couple of months now. We knew eachother in high school and we dated. Then he went off to boot camp for 8 weeks. Thoese were a hard 8 weeks for me because I couldnt call or write to him. FInally last week he got his phone back so he could call me and his family. He’s now in texas until december 17 when he comes home for christmas. I was wondering how you or anyone can handle being a military wife/girlfriend. Its hard for me because Im so close to him and it hurts when I dont see him because hes at his tech school. Does it get any easyer? Is their anything I can do to get my mind off of it? Any help would be greatly appericated.

    • Stacey November 10, 2011, 9:15 pm

      I don’t think it ever gets “easier”, I think you just figure out how to cope with it. The biggest thing to remember is that you still have to live your life even though he’s gone. You can’t hit a pause button until he returns. Remember, that he is doing what he wants to do and you need to do the same. That doesn’t mean go off in completely separate directions – frequent communication (as much as is allowed) is vital. But don’t wrap your identity up so much in him that you lose your own sense of self. The separations of the Army can make you stronger both as an individual and as a couple.

  • Jennifer November 10, 2011, 9:38 pm

    Thanks stacy, as of last night, I got to talk to him on skype. I am now engaged to him. I do try to live me life but its hard. I work go to school study spend time with my firends/family. I feel like us being sseprated is hard but aslo its making our relationship stonger. I try and tell myself that hes doing this for not only himself but alot of other people. He wants to protect his country. I wish he wasnt that far away from me but he has to do what he has to do. I really wish he could be home now. Its 26 days till hes home if your only counting week days. its 36 days if your counting week days and weekends. When he comes home december 17th its will be a huge reliefe but with the relife come a worry and that is he might be sent to south calroina. And be gone for 6 months to maybe even a year or 2. How can I handle something like that. I feel like if thats going to happen then I should transger everying from school and go with him. But on the other hand Im leaving behind all my family and friends. Thats a fear of mind though. How can these army wifes and now including myself handle such a perdickament like this. How do we know that our husbands or for myself my financa will be ok? So many questions go though my mind its hard. Do any of the military/army wifes ever feel like crying when their husbands/ financia are gone for so long? I cried last night after I finsihed talking to him on skype. I cried today for no reason it just came on out of no where. How can we deal with something like this? I can say that now that Im going to be a military wife I will defenly need support from other military wifes. Its got to be hard. Im just finding out how hard it can be.

    • Stacey November 10, 2011, 10:56 pm

      It’s okay if you cry. 😉 I certainly did my fair share. You will have good days and bad. The key is to let those bad days when you just allow yourself to wallow in the sadness to be few and far between and pick yourself back up the next day. You guys will figure out what works for you and how to make this work.

  • Jennifer November 11, 2011, 1:56 pm

    Stacy-
    Thank you for the advice. I talked to him this morning. Hes going out with some of his buddies this weekend off base. Do you ever feel like when you talk to your husband/boyfirned/fiancia 🙂 and they say oh im going to be hanging out with some buddies or Im leaving base for the weekend and after you talk to him and you say goodbye you get this feel like something might happen to him. I hate this feeling. Andrew told me that he is just going to be having fun this weekend and not to worry about anything. Of couse when I answer him saying ok, i get chocked up and he’s lik “Jen, I’m going to be fine. Just realx” I then feel bad because I dont want him to worry about me but I worry about him everyday. But however I have had alot of distractions today because I had school but for a half day and I took my sister out to lunch. That was a great distraction. Now im home realxing but I have to find something to do. What do you do when you need to get ur husband/boyfriend/financia off your mind? Any help on that would soooo save me LOL. Talk to you later. Thank you so much for responding back to me. I really appericate it.

    • Stacey November 12, 2011, 2:07 pm

      I always had that feeling during deployments and it drove me insane. 😉 Even now, I still tell him to “be careful” every time we get off the phone. To be honest, this website is what kept me busy a lot of the time. Writing for it, promoting it, etc plus I had my own business outside of this as well. Whenever he was gone, I buried myself in work and would be at the computer from the time I woke up until I was so exhausted I would basically fall asleep before my head hit the pillow. Not exactly the healthiest way to deal with it but my business did great during that time! LOL

  • Jennifer November 12, 2011, 6:58 pm

    Omg are u serious? haha its got to be hard. I got to talk to him today and he said their was nothing going on really he was teaching his budy how to spar. My fianica Andrew has taken marshal arts for 13 years. Hes pretty good with it. I have only talked it 4 and stoped because of the other things that I do. today I actually did a yoga class. Stacey Im telling you it was SOOOOOO MUCH RELIEF. I walked out of that class feeling amazing. Its for women who have husbands, boyfriends, financia in the military. I absoultly loved it. The teacher of the class helped me out so much. If I start stressing out that he hasnted texted, called, emilaed, skype etc I just go into this mood think about absoulty nothing do some breathing exerices and in 10 minutes I felt great. Tomorrow Im going to probulary have to do that after I go to church and brunch with my family because Andrew isnt going to be able to call me. He has to be back at base at 21hunred hours whatever that means and quciky taked a shower and do some kind of drill. I wish he stop working so hard but hes theire to protect our county right?? How long has your husband been gone? Please know I appericate him protecing our country. When does he come home? haha well I should get off andrew is calling. Ill talk to you tomorrow. Thanks for staying in touch. I feel better talking to a military wife. Now I’m starting to get use to how its going to be and how us military wifes stick together.

  • Jennifer November 13, 2011, 8:51 pm

    OK so I have a stupid question. Now that Im engaed to a miliary man, what are my benfits or do I not get any.? I just dont know how that works and Im sort of afriad to ask my fiancia? I dont want to sound dumb. Hes not judgementa at all but I want him to know that Im trying to learn about the military and the lingo and the benfits but honstly Im so confused. How can I ask him? Any help will be great.

  • Sarah December 9, 2011, 4:48 pm

    I am trying to find you on facebook but that link just gets re-directed to the facebook home page. Can you add another link? Or let me know how to find you. Thanks

    • Stacey December 10, 2011, 10:28 am

      The icon on the right goes right to it – please let me know which one isn’t working. The buttons below the post are share buttons that allow you to share the content to Facebook. My Facebook page is http://www.facebook.com/marriedtothearmy. Thanks!

      • Sarah December 10, 2011, 6:07 pm

        The icon and the link just goes straight to the facebook homepage when I click on it. I will try and search for it instead.

  • Vanessa December 27, 2011, 12:28 pm

    Hello,
    I found this web site and it seemed really interesting,
    I am 19 will be 20 in three months. And I am engaged to an army boy, he is wanting to get married after he was done with airborne, but that’s just about 6 months left, and I am a student, studying medical field, and I am trying to decide if to wait until I get my associated on 2013 or until he gets done with his project…

  • amy January 21, 2012, 5:35 pm

    Hi. I’m really new to this. My boyfriend is in Afghanistan and this is all new to me. We actually met on line and tbere was this instant connection. He wants to get married when he comes home in march. My question is this…how do you handle the times when your husband/boyfriend cant call or text? I find myself worrying constantly and also watching the clock to figure out what time he will be up and waiting for that call or text from him. We have awesone communication. Qe write emails several times a day,even the morning wake up emails for me from him. Any help or suggestions will be appreciated. Thanks.

  • diane January 27, 2012, 8:48 pm

    well amy. i too am new to this an meet my soldier on line and there was an instant connection. he is also in afghanistan due to come home jan 30,2012. we too are getting married this 2012, n talked just about everyday since we hooked up on line. i would wake up every morning looking to chat with him on line until one day about a wk. ago no contact. after 2 days went by then 3 then 4 i went crazy, thinking all kinds of things just worried. then watching the news n they mention afghanistan n that a plane crash with solider , well girl my heart skipped a beat , when i heard nato soldier n marnies god forgive me but i felt alil better. still worried still havent heard from him still counting the days. just 2 more days n he’ll be home n i cant wait. crazy thoughts are still going threw my head but not until i found this website it did make me feel better so keep busy n find a kick boxing or zumba class n relieve the stress.my soldier is talking retirement when he gets home. he has 15yrs in, my dumb ass had the nerve to tell him why not do 20yrs, if he wants to retire i will be very supportive.its hard being a army wife, girlfriend, fiance,etc. keep the faith.

  • amy January 27, 2012, 9:25 pm

    Well I have disturbing news…the guy I thought was in the army was actually a scan artist. He tried to get me to send him money so he could get home, when I told him no he stopped talking to me. All he told me was a lie.the name he is using is Dave haggard so all beware. These men need to be stopped. It’s not right to use the army for a lie. I was truly crushed.

  • simone turnee April 27, 2012, 11:26 pm

    My name is simone…i was searchin the web for info for being a army wife..i got married to my husband in november and he is in the army…i jus wanted to kno …once he gose active duty do we move rite away or do it take a while

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